A thread for friends of the English language

[plattbauer]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

My heart's in the Highlands, my heart is not here, My heart's in the Highlands, a-chasing the deer...

Instead of a heart Scottish highlanders have a bottle of whiskey in
their bodies. In former times they exchanged their hearts and got
suntan oil for them with a high sun protection factor. That's why all
highlanders are as brown as hazelnuts.

 

[redbaron]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

Instead of a heart Scottish highlanders have a bottle of whiskey in
their bodies. In former times they exchanged their hearts and got
suntan oil for them with a high sun protection factor. That's why all
highlanders are as brown as hazelnuts.

Scottish Higlanders also know an air protection factor. Since blood bauer has been there...

The Red Baron

 

[Cosima]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

Scottish Higlanders also know an air protection factor. Since blood bauer has been there...

The Red Baron

To my knowledge the highlands are very stormy and windy. Even flatfarmer's farts cannot pollute the air, even if he tries very hard!

An effective limitation of damage by nature!

After leaving his active behind his farts are blown in all directions right away!

Cheers
Cosima

 

[plattbauer]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

To my knowledge the highlands are very stormy and windy. Even flatfarmer's farts cannot pollute the air, even if he tries very hard!

An effective limitation of damage by nature!

After leaving his active behind his farts are blown in all directions right away!

Cheers
Cosima

Dear Cosima - love of my old days, my only friend far and wide,

pity your knowedge of my farts is so full of gaps. With the help of my farts
I cut the grain on my huge fields. My farts are also helpful in slaughtering
cows and pigs because they anaesthetize them in a very human way.
With the help of the finest of my farts I bake very aromatic cakes.
I gladly will send you a frozen fart. You may defrost it in your kitchen.
Perhaps my fart will help you with your housework.

Ever your smelly flatfarmer

 

[Joost]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

To my knowledge the highlands are very stormy and windy.

Three cheers for the Scottish Highlands!

 

[plattbauer]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

Dear Cosima,

please don't wrap you in silence, but answer my remarkable words and
jump over the words of other writers.

Ever and ever your flatfarmer

 

[Cosima]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

Dear Cosima,

please don't wrap you in silence, but answer my remarkable words and
jump over the words of other writers.

Ever and ever your flatfarmer

Well, dearest friend of my soul,

I am so impressed by your flatulent accomplishments that adequate words are still missing me!
Maybe later in the day, since I don't want to put you off with trivial remarks!

Most sincerely yours,

Cosima

 

[Cosima]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

Three cheers for the Scottish Highlands!

So at least your heart is still in the highlands !
Why don't you find yourself a scotsman and live with him where your heart yearns to be?

Cosima

 

[plattbauer]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

So at least your heart is still in the highlands !
Why don't you find yourself a scotsman and live with him where your heart yearns to be?

Cosima

Dearest Cosima fullfilling all my inside, taking away my breath,

I am so happy that you do even look at me, that you are going to allow
myself a little break now. I'll throw me on your feet hoping that you won't
get cold feet.
Out of your rosy mouth soon will come such wonderfull words that I'll have troubles in understanding.

Ever ever your
flatfarmer

 

[Cosima]

AW: A thread for friends of the English language

Dearest Cosima fullfilling all my inside, taking away my breath,

I am so happy that you do even look at me, that you are going to allow
myself a little break now. I'll throw me on your feet hoping that you won't
get cold feet.
Out of your rosy mouth soon will come such wonderfull words that I'll have troubles in understanding.

Ever ever your
flatfarmer

Well flatfarmer,

It is strange.... I really wanted to write a regular hymn about your most wonderful achievements of setting to good use your unusual talents, but all that came into my mind was connected with bad smells, noses wrinkled, disdainful looks and so on!

What a mess!

Please don't let this drag you down or depress you, it is all my fault and my limited phantasy.

Forever yours,
Cosima